tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post1682241882114411791..comments2024-02-16T11:32:52.407-05:00Comments on ModernSauce: Final Destination: The TJ Maxx in the sky.ModernSaucehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08993930835985764220noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-64775974007208492932011-01-07T09:21:18.394-05:002011-01-07T09:21:18.394-05:00Zrzuce - It was fun while it lasted... I hope the...Zrzuce - It was fun while it lasted... I hope there's plenty of chicken-heading in the TJ Maxx in the sky because my afterlife won't be complete without it. I think we should work on a murder suicide pact because I really don't want my afterlife to exist without the fiercest gayety ever recorded in heaven OR earth. ; ) <br /><br />Izzy - ahahahaha!! Restraining myself from all the 'black hole' and ASSymptotic jokes running through my head. Must.... hold.... back....<br /><br />Collier - Hope you made it through your night safely! I think if you get impaled with a unicorn in your dreams it means you'll have a lucky day when you wake up... or something like that... Welcome to the sauce!!ModernSaucehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08993930835985764220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-39484456903551888862011-01-07T00:28:28.764-05:002011-01-07T00:28:28.764-05:00It's getting late as I leave this reply, but h...It's getting late as I leave this reply, but having read of your ghastly demise, I'm afraid to lay down lest I dream of impaling unicorns.Collier Wardhttp://www.buildingcontent.highercontent.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-4781112033191228162011-01-07T00:10:31.544-05:002011-01-07T00:10:31.544-05:00Barycenter is an f'n awesome word! Using it, w...Barycenter is an f'n awesome word! Using it, while referencing event horizons, AND rhinestone embellished boxes - freakin' genius.<br /><br />I fully expect a phoenix-like rebirth for you MS (such fabulosity as yours couldn't possibly be fully spent in a single lifetime).<br /><br />Well played...izzydarlowhttp://www.modarchstudio.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-18739659663925698652011-01-06T23:14:27.987-05:002011-01-06T23:14:27.987-05:00"However, the deliberation over plot location..."However, the deliberation over plot location, casket, etc. carried out for weeks." <br /><br />Jamey, imagine this length of time, and then triple it.<br /><br />This saucy lady was the barycenter of an entire gay universe of fabulosity. Her glitter force attracted gays at a rate unparalleled in the natural world, resulting in the fiercest gayety ever recorded. The incredible concentration of pretentious hors d’oeuvres and copious wine meant that nothing could escape its sashaying ways, not even a ballcap-wearing, beer-toting, four-wheeler-driving tea partier. It was said that a straight approaching too near the circuit party horizon would be swished up never to be seen at football games again.<br /><br />With her passing now come to pass, this gay galaxy will queen out—an incredible <i>Super!</i> Nova. By the time all the tears have been shed, all the bitches have been cut, all the chicken-heading has ceased, and all of the fabulous plans have been made, the vajazzled madame--apart from her rhinestones--will have ceased to be, the ultimate no-expectations exit.Zrzucenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-26469337551914290642011-01-06T21:36:27.967-05:002011-01-06T21:36:27.967-05:00Celebrate your Madden love!!Celebrate your Madden love!!ModernSaucehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08993930835985764220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-72666813842788665592011-01-06T21:34:06.935-05:002011-01-06T21:34:06.935-05:00I realize that. I actually re-read it to be sure o...I realize that. I actually re-read it to be sure of that, but went with it anyways. Who doesn't have a hard-on for John Madden? That's what I want to know. I'll have words with him/her.Jamey Burrellhttp://www.lifeasanexperiment.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-43196082770071362902011-01-06T21:24:19.387-05:002011-01-06T21:24:19.387-05:00Jamey - I died by vajazzling!!!! It's like yo...Jamey - I died by vajazzling!!!! It's like you didn't even read the post... : ( Also I think you have a hard-on for John Madden. Just sayin.<br /><br />PS - Unicorns are naturally anti-bacterial. duh.ModernSaucehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08993930835985764220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-10143503995638128532011-01-06T21:01:42.285-05:002011-01-06T21:01:42.285-05:00I cannot believe you'd take Unicorns over John...I cannot believe you'd take Unicorns over John Maddens. I know you're going to be cremated, but let's assume for one second that your survivors (Charlemagne & Friends) ignored your dying wishes and went with a traditional burial. However, the deliberation over plot location, casket, etc. carried out for weeks. Meanwhile, Ms. Saucy Pants is chilling at the funeral home. Unicorn death = body riddled with holes & quite stinky. Enter nomadic pack of John Maddens, and you are looking at fungus free after life thanks to the power of BOOM, Tough Actin' Tinactin. Given the choice, I'll take that monster of a bumbling man over a unicorn in a heartbeat.Jamey Burrellhttp://www.lifeasanexperiment.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-58242445909836059362011-01-06T20:36:32.732-05:002011-01-06T20:36:32.732-05:00Madame Sunday is most certainly in heaven, where R...Madame Sunday is most certainly in heaven, where <i>Refreshing White</i> Franzia--or perhaps <i>Chablis</i>--falls like rain; where thrift stores are always stocked with fabulous--yet extraordinarily cheap--vintage furniture and home décor; where white rooms populated by chili-and-dark-chocolate-eating humans and black-furred cats continue for all eternity without any stains; where gardeners and weekend warriors use industrially-designed, color-striped yard tools; where bunnies in gas masks hop between serpents of feathers; and where everyone lives in a tree house of insanity.Zrzucenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-55526827160779819692011-01-05T09:26:05.379-05:002011-01-05T09:26:05.379-05:00Alexandra - I think I'm in some sort of blogge...Alexandra - I think I'm in some sort of blogger purgatory. If I don't bring more readers I'll never get to heaven. <br /><br />Your imaginary twin is a dirty slut.ModernSaucehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08993930835985764220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-13375157875076087122011-01-05T00:19:07.064-05:002011-01-05T00:19:07.064-05:00What I want to know is, are you now in Hell or Hea...What I want to know is, are you now in Hell or Heaven? Or a discussion group somewhere? It's just that I haven't decided yet if I want to totally suck up and be your BFF in the undead world of the afterlife. And is your unicorn done with that head horn thing yet? My imaginary twin is getting lonely.AlexandraFunFithttp://funandfit.orgnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-74463599155291587752011-01-04T19:24:33.615-05:002011-01-04T19:24:33.615-05:00Rich - lost innocence does seem to sparkle more. ...Rich - lost innocence does seem to sparkle more. I think it's the contrast against all that delicious filth that really sets it off. <br /><br />Extremely Average - I'm glad to see you out of your bunker but sad it came at such an unfortunate time. And you bet your ass I'll be haunting this blog! But my ghost will be missing fingers and a hole through the middle thanks to that damn unicorn so there's that...<br /><br />Steve - start slow! I suggest just working on being passive aggressive and then build up to shaming before contempt. You can't be a master immediately! It's a process.<br /><br />Becky - Gawd your bleeding heart liberal tendencies are really getting in the way of my living and all... ; )<br /><br />David - Vajazzling is pretty popular (if you're a stripper) but I think someone should make a PSA against them in my name. I lived to help others. Just like I'm telling you to absolutely join the Ace rewards program even though there aren't any stores in Switzerland. I care that much. And I'm haunting this blog.ModernSaucehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08993930835985764220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-83425718362067168282011-01-04T19:21:04.456-05:002011-01-04T19:21:04.456-05:00Absolutely hilarious. And educational -- I was pr...Absolutely hilarious. And educational -- I was previously unaware of vajazzling. Do you think it will catch on? While I'm asking questions, how did you get into the Ace Rewards Program? And why am I asking a dead chick all of this stuff?David Mathiashttp://www.wood-and-light.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-55673439272990980782011-01-04T17:06:32.280-05:002011-01-04T17:06:32.280-05:00Darn! And just when I'd maxed out my annual co...Darn! And just when I'd maxed out my annual contribution to the Anti dead wood spider haven fund, too.<br /><br />;)Becky / @ecomodhttp://eco-modernism.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-43198145522333986572011-01-04T17:01:15.020-05:002011-01-04T17:01:15.020-05:00I'm still trying to figure out how to raise a ...I'm still trying to figure out how to raise a kid on both white bread and contempt! ;-)Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09355355243225613426noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-22054342284999573682011-01-04T16:45:07.252-05:002011-01-04T16:45:07.252-05:00I have been hiding in my bunker in Martelle lately...I have been hiding in my bunker in Martelle lately, only occasionally popping my head out, to see if I can see my shadow. Today I noticed some chatter on twitter and decided to pop over and see what all of the fuss was about.<br /><br />I am deeply saddened by the loss of Madame Sauce, though I look forward to her future posts from beyond the grave. I have always suspected that her spectacular wit was only surpassed by her haunting beauty, perhaps her ghost will confirm this for us all.<br /><br />R.I.P My friend.Extremely Averagehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12091831282668222931noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-28178060335755993612011-01-04T16:42:25.293-05:002011-01-04T16:42:25.293-05:00Saucey, we hardly knew ye. Or truth be told, we kn...Saucey, we hardly knew ye. Or truth be told, we knew an awful lot. Awful. Lot. TMI was your specialty. You set a standard which will be hard to equal - my glitterometer can't calibrate that low - oh, just forget the Equal, let's go for straight-up gleaming sugary whiteness. Your deathly pallor must have been a site for sore angel eyes, blinding in its lost innocence. Where can we turn for design-on-a-dimebag advice now? A sad, sad day...Rich Holschuhhttp://concretedetail.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-31268645885224707922011-01-04T15:18:22.519-05:002011-01-04T15:18:22.519-05:00Cindy - I don't trust all these newfangled way...Cindy - I don't trust all these newfangled ways of jazzing up your vajayjay. Simple is best that's why duct tape always works. (but not anywhere near your vajayjay.)<br /><br />Joseph - Actually I googled all the things to actually put in an obit and stayed true to the form! Some details may have been embellished... (and I was't talkin 'bout the vajayjay this time)<br /><br />Dogwalkblog - Charlemagne is a diva girl kitty. I used a dude's name because she just needed a name with power. Gawd help the dumb vet techs try to pronounce it when I take her in. And yes - she'll fuck a mutt up.<br /><br />Tabitha - I aim to please. Even in death!<br /><br />Jamey - it's a gift. or curse. One of the two... And if I was going to choose death by unicorn or death by John Maddens I'd be batshit crazy to NOT pick unicorns. WTF is wrong with you???!!! ; )<br /><br />Energyvanguard - glittery makes up for ALL pain and violence! And secretly I do kinda hope to go out that way... Better than just old age. Boooorrriiinnng!<br /><br />Chamois - go forth and shop proudly in my glittery honor!!ModernSaucehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08993930835985764220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-24831104678084781582011-01-04T15:12:37.456-05:002011-01-04T15:12:37.456-05:00What a fantabulous way to go is all I have to say!...What a fantabulous way to go is all I have to say! Next time I'm at TJ Maxx, I will remember Ms Beavers with reverent fondness as I peel out of the parking lot, sending her glittering ashes over the wind.Chamoishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09658595962079138485noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-56823632642593018562011-01-04T14:57:01.729-05:002011-01-04T14:57:01.729-05:00'Bleeding, fingerless and glittery' It may...'Bleeding, fingerless and glittery' It may be violent and painful, but at least it's glittery. Wow! What a great obituary. I hope that's not actually the way it plays out for you, though.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-38932095051766738222011-01-04T13:17:24.750-05:002011-01-04T13:17:24.750-05:00I'm rendered speechless. Not even my most unin...I'm rendered speechless. Not even my most uninterrupted streams of goofy consciousness could I ever concoct such a magnificently bizarre series of events. <br /><br />However, if I had to change anything, I would replace stampeding unicorns with team of announcing John Maddens. At least your final fleeting minutes could be incoherently commentated and the telestrator use would be fantastically irrelevant.Jamey @ Eco-Protective Productshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12481061506055881139noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-51615150709913537922011-01-04T11:59:59.664-05:002011-01-04T11:59:59.664-05:00Hilarious... always the sauce... bahaha.Hilarious... always the sauce... bahaha.Tabithahttp://26at41.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-28428720405791778502011-01-04T10:01:29.373-05:002011-01-04T10:01:29.373-05:00HA the cat is a he, isn't he? The order is alr...HA the cat is a he, isn't he? The order is already breaking down...DogWalkBloghttp://www.dogwalkblog.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-54170802632093718762011-01-04T09:59:47.444-05:002011-01-04T09:59:47.444-05:0030.. and I only had one margarita tonight :-) What...30.. and I only had one margarita tonight :-) What would Charlemagne the cat play with if there were no more spiders in the dead wood? She'd move on to fighting dogs, that's what! Pretty soon she would be knocking over Dollar Generals for her fix of glue. A little compassion for the mutts you leave behind. Save the spiders....DogWalkBloghttp://www.dogwalkblog.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5188195156470808711.post-27754663918889501002011-01-04T09:49:53.274-05:002011-01-04T09:49:53.274-05:00Not quite sure an obituary would actually read tha...Not quite sure an obituary would actually read that way, but it would be fun to see something like that every now and again!Josephhttp://www.cft411.comnoreply@blogger.com