Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Bedroom ReSaucification 2014 Update

Heeeey, the sauce is still flowing!  Do not fret.  Things got a little hectic at the Ranch these past few weeks so please enjoy this riveting update.

Somehow as the seasons change everything seems to happen at once.  I can open the windows, Charlemagne decides to ignore me for the great weather, my car requires even more unexpected maintenance, I pretend like it's 2005 and watch Lost, I pretend like I have skills and cook a lot, I hosted book club at my house a week ago and still might have dishes in the sink from it, I broke the legs to a chair sitting in it while trying to instagram something and all other brands of normal domestic fuckery.

But some things are more fuckery than domestic bliss.

So thanks to some stormy conditions my appropriately-named (terribly-named?) storm door blew off the front of my house where it was bolted to.  No big deal.  I just moved it to my back patio where it could hang out with my just-replaced washing machine that I keep forgetting to call the thrift store to come get.  The only way I could get more white trash is if I had a car with three flat tires in my driveway.  

Sigh... guess it's time to do some yardwork this weekend.  The one shitty part about Spring.  Oh and the searing sinus pain and tornadic activity that rips doors from their hinges.  

But it wasn't all terrible.  I made a pretty thing!

I took a class on building a terrarium through a new local non-profit called The Chattery.  Turns out it's way more complicated than throwing dirt in a vase which probably explains why I kill a lot of things I plant.  Yay scienze!

For you local readers, the class was only $15 and all I brought was a vase and a few bucks so I could buy accessories.  It was the most fun I'd had in awhile - like anal-retentive gardening meets doll house decorating.  Worth it.

But I did get some real house decorating done too and progress has been made in Bedroom ReSaucification 2014.

Ok well not here but we're just saying farewell to Wedgewood Grey.  It's been real.

Picking the color was easy for ONCE in my wishy washy life.  Unfortunately Lowe's gave me the wrong finish which I didn't realize until I painted and edged everything and it dried gross and I wanted to die.  

Fun fact: if you act nice enough they will, in fact, refund non-refundable paint.  They didn't give me a refund on the hours I wasted painting but I'm just considering it a weird primer.

And I also picked the green color for my accent wall in record time and limited number of samples.  But then my uterus decided to throw a wrench in my plan and, well, my uterus and I bought some PMS-induced new paint samples.

Dear gawd, it was terrible.  Won't be getting that money back either nor my brain before the mental image of wall vomit.

But it was all worked out in the end and the painting part is done without much more drama.
Apparently I LOVE Stepstool.
I'm not sure how a few hours of painting takes me three days of work but thanks a lot, prep work.  Actually had to clean my room for real.  Fucking baseboards, man.

The final colors were Forest Canopy from Valspar and Pantone's Cloud Dancer (also Valspar paint).  I like to think that the canopy of the forest dances in the clouds... SHUT UP THEY'RE PAINT FRIENDS!

I'd never used Valspar but thought it was good paint. Thumbs up from the Madame.
Forest Canopy is a green that's almost black.  It's almost the color of an overripe avocado skin which is kinda what my walls look like since they are also textured with bumps.  I'm totally down with that.  However, if rotting avocado is grossing you out, it reads as black in the picture but in person it's like a shadowy, non-color.  My favorite type of color.  

I love the green on the wall and am frankly I'm more scared of three completely white walls.  It's like a padded cell.  I gotta get some curtains up fast.

Thank goodness I went to the IKE-Rah this past weekend!  Which turned out to be the dumbest thing ever since they were having a special Bring Your Own Friend event and it was like a war zone in there.  I need counseling.  Bring Your Own Therapist day at IKEA.

I got some curtains and a couple of MALMs and spent the next 983498349389 hours drinking wine, watching Lost and doing this shit:

*softly weeping*

Charlemagne helped.  By looking aloof.

But I finally finished and I'll spend the next three days organizing my clothes into twice - TWICE - the amount of drawers I had.  Luxury, I tell you!

Next up, this little guy:

I bought this nightstand for $3 at a garage sale a few years ago and it's finally getting a real home!

And a coat of paint and some new knobs.  In July knowing how speedy I work...

In the meantime, let's all eat some delicious muesli.
This box of muesli cost three times as much as that nightstand.  Let that sink in.

I've been obsessed with muesli for about five years after trying the real deal from a Swiss chef.  I found the above magnificence this week and it's amazing.  Make their Birchermuesli recipe straight off the side of the box because Nestle Tollhouse makes some good cookies from their recipe so the side of the package is fine.  Don't get fancy.

I need to replenish after IKEA.  I'm still having flashbacks.

Enjoy the impending Spring, y'all!


  1. You've been busy!! I feel like such a slacker in my house, but my seeds are growing. I even bought some fancy fish emulsion fertilizer, so the plants are rockstars, but my spare bedroom smells like dead fish. What can you do.

    1. Hahaha well I totally forgot about my seeds until you just said that so I guess we're even.

      Except for the fish smell... ; )