Thursday, October 30, 2014

This makes me exceedingly happy.

You can just turn off your porch light and dive into your candy head first because your Halloween decorations are all shit.

I've failed a bit at Halloween this year - my front porch has two sad pumpkins on it and nothing else and I haven't even practiced my party eye makeup.  I'm not even really doing a costume because the last time I went to a "costume" party on Halloween I was the only person dressed up which was uncomfortable as fuck.  

Everyone was wearing their holiday jorts and I was at the buffet shoving sausage balls into my mouth balancing a skull in my other hand, wearing a dramatic black felt hat and looking like I just walked off the set of AHS Coven: redneck edition.

Adults, man.  Sometimes they're the worst.

Next year I vow to have a party and you can ONLY come if you dress up!

Or can carve pumpkins like a boss.

I'll probably be all alone in costume yet again...  


  1. ok, so i had to look up "jorts"... now, is there something special about holiday jorts? and i can't remember the weather in the south, obv, b/c i was all thinking it's already cooled down there for you guys.

    1. Haha I was just being bitter about everyone else's non-costume outfits. But yeah, sometimes people are still wearing shorts down here even at Thanksgiving. We're a stubborn folk...