Thursday, September 11, 2014

Dream cars and pastel bombshells.

During my blog vacation I went out and "did" things like a "real" person and one of those things was a trip to the High Museum in our favorite city of Southern sprawl, Atlanta.  

I'm so cultured.

You may remember my unexpected lust for automobiles this summer where I squeed myself sore over some cute motorized cartoon cars.  At that time I learned that the High Museum was having a dream car exhibit so I vowed to go.  Thanks, serendipity!    

So I got in my very sensible, boring and completely-paid-for car to go visit some fantasy rides and it was entirely worth it.  They extended the exhibit through THIS Sunday (the 14th) and I highly recommend you go if you're in the area and have $20.

Feel free to hum the Dreamgirls song while viewing the cars.  I couldn't stop myself.

Remember, I don't even like cars but look at these beauties...

Here's the Edsel Ford Special Speedster looking like a badass alligator.  Oddly, it was my favorite color of all of them - a deep, saturated olive green.  I'm partial to green right now so I'm sure it was a boring color to everyone else but I found it incredibly sexy.

Imagine a smartly dressed WWII blonde bombshell in military uniform and bright red lips - that's what this car is.  I have a whole Indiana Jones thing going on in my head.  Nevermind that this is from 1934 and perhaps too early to fight Nazis but time has no value in my fantasies.

I took a surprising amount of wheel shots.  I just can't resist a good detail.

1948 Tasco
Or butt.  Nothing but car butts for me, please.  The one above is kinda smiling.  Cheeky little bastard.

You may have thought the Apple Watch was an exciting piece of future design but this 1953 Firebird looks like a jet so kindly fuck off, Apple.

Also, here's the "Electric Egg" designed by French artist and industrial designer Paul Arzens in 1942 as his personal car during the war.  An electric car more than 70 years ago so think on that for a bit...

Also, look at how cute that little silver butt is.  I'm in love with this little teardrop.  It was fairly rusted and definitely showed its age which made me like it more.

If you're interested in something more traditional-looking here's the 1941 Chrysler Thunderbolt.

It has a roof and headlights controlled electrically by buttons on the leather-covered dashboard.  

My driver side visor is broken and just flops around when I hit a bump.  Or when there's thunder.  

A highlight of the exhibit was the 1936 Stout Scarab - something I got excited about from researching this summer's post.

It was the precursor to the modern minivan, obviously, except this version's back seating could convert into a couch and a table.  I have a cup holder filled with sticky pennies.  Scarab: 1. Lacy: 0

The Scarab's smiling face.  I'd like to see that sunny disposition slide by me in oncoming traffic.   This handsome fellow really was modeled after the beetle with the same name as indicated by cute scarab detail on its nose in the center.

More wheel lust.  I do have pictures of the butt but I have to draw the line somewhere.

Not here!

This 1955 Chrsyler "Gilda" was said to be shaped by the wind. 

How come the wind always shapes me into a mess?  Fuckin wind, man.

Arrow door handles were shot by Cupid straight into my heart.

I also really appreciated a trio of American-made cars in the center of the exhibit.  Straight-up jet airplane meets Mad Men meets spy cars.  I actually felt very patriotic during much of this exhibit because 'yay America actually did contribute something positive to the world one time!' and it was very shiny.

1951 GM Le Sabre
One of my favorites was this ivory and cherry red 1956 Buick Centurion.  See a full picture of it here.

I'm dying over this all glass top.  It had a rear-mounted camera and a viewscreen on its dash...  In 1956.  Doesn't it kinda make the same features in today's cars seem less exciting?  I guess we spent the last 60 years working on improving "safety" and "efficiency" or something.

Of course, I can't even play my ipod in my car so I probably shouldn't judge.

Centurion jet butt.

Next to the Centurion is the 1959 Cadillac Cyclone butt.

I have a blurry picture of its headlights but it was starting to feel sleazy...

You know how there are those dudes you see on tv who are sexually attracted to cars and have sex with their mufflers and want to marry them?  Well, I totally get it now because if I had a dick I would totally try to put it in one of these cars.

For the dessert course of our exhibit we have the 2007 recreation of the 1935 Bugatti Aerolithe.  Only five were ever made and most likely they were stripped to create other models so this is what we get and I'm fine with it.

I would say staring at these giant scoops of pistachio ice cream is almost a spiritual experience.  My car also feels like a spiritual experience - more like a Winchester sending my soul to hell feeling but still a spiritual experience.

For the record, there's no way Rick Ross could have got in this car.  I'm pretty sure my ass would have to hang out the window were I to get a ride but I don't care I'd still feel sexy.

Some cars deserve petting and stroking.  

My car deserves a long drive off of a short pier into a lake of grenades.

The superfun detailing that I hope you can see is that it's assembled using rivets.  So it's sleek and pastel but looks like it was forged in a factory that made bombs.  Or an Italian Mount Doom.  

I would like this to be my new aesthetic - sweet pastel bombshell.  Emphasis on BOMB.  

First step in this new aesthetic is that I gotta get a new car.  My side mirror got destroyed by a daycare van driving towards me in oncoming traffic that sideswiped me and then drove off.  So now I have the shards of a mirror glued on and some dangling paper.  True story.  Double check where you send your kids to daycare is all I'm saying.

Now if it was a Stout Scarab that destroyed my side mirror I'd probably thank it just for saying hello and ask to take a picture of its butt.

So now my car lust has intensified dramatically.  

But I would highly recommend this exhibit even if you don't love cars but DO love design.  Or shiny things.  Or history.  Or America.  Or pastel ice cream bombs.  

See more about exhibit and the cars I didn't show you (and better pictures of the ones I did) here.  You will DEFINITELY want to buy your tickets online.  It's a crowded show but everyone was friendly and respectful when it came to picture-taking.  Except for the middle-aged white men who were completely unaware that their dad jorts and weird shoes were messing up my Instagram moments...    

I'd also suggest getting the audio guided tour - a few random strangers were stopping me and telling me about the cars as we walked around, that's how cool the extra info apparently was.  I was more like "yay shiny butts!"

If you actually do make it down to the ATL this weekend or soon, my fellow dream car dreamer and I went over to the Westside and hung out at the new Bellwoods Social House for refreshments and day drinking.  I think I might have been day drunk...

Who doesn't love a good bar shot?  I always feel so fancy.

And nothing seems fancier than shiny bars and shiny cars.

Rhyming is definitely not fancy.  

Neither is a hillbilly in the big city.

Gawd, I'm making this worse...

Enjoy the cars even if it's just here.


  1. i thought i couldn't play my ipod in my car either, then someone reminded me about these:

    and it changed everything! i was surprised - it didn't sound completely terrible like i expected!

    1. Haha! I tried the one that went through the radio but never thought to go even more basic - good call! And for $20 it sounds well worth it!

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  3. Ok, I know these cars probably weren't mass produced ever but damn, design that good makes me want to cry.

    1. Yeah, some had a dozen made (or fewer) and some maybe had more. I know they were "fantasy" cars but it was still impressive what people were able to do 70 years ago!