Happy July, my saucy patriots! I hope you spent a nice long weekend celebrating the only things still making this country great: alcohol, naps and explosions. And not necessarily in that order. I also personally threw in some pool time (banging through summer bucket list!) and Deep Space Nine but maybe that's just me.
I had planned to show you bedroom updates but please see above note about alcohol and naps. I woke up too late from my nap today to get pictures... sowwwwy.
But in somewhat related news regarding minimal white rooms, I've been obsessed with, well, minimal white rooms. I think it's a continuation of my summer dreams where I want everything - my wardrobe, my house, my teeth - to be sparkling white like a summer fairy with exquisite dental hygiene.
Like Elle Fanning as Aurora but not so fucking annoying. Elle Fanning in the streets, Maleficent in the sheets. White sheets. I guess technically it's Elle Fanning there too? Shit.
I will admit that it's not JUST me being drawn in this direction. If you read design blogs (do people still do that anymore?) I'm seeing a lot of girls proclaim newfound lust over organic modern slash California slash refreshing burst of interior sunshine. I think everyone collectively can't stand to look at another neon thing so we're like "I'll just take white kthanxbai."
I have some Deep Thoughts (TM) about minimalism and white that I'm sure you'll be riveted to hear about but I'd rather look at interior porn right now. I've had two cocktails AFTER I woke up from my nap so that probably won't make for really coherent poetical moments.
OR WILL IT?!?!??!!?!
This House in the Hills blog/actual home keeps popping up in my Pinterest/wet dreams and is worth checking out. But they seem to have all the correct elements for my California white, wet dreams. [MS sidebar: gross.] It's all about texture: wood, leather, rattan, mangy textiles, concrete, marble, metallic. Oh and a round mirror. I gotta get me one of those but they be expensive.
A vintage something is also necessary as well as a very dramatic statement plant. Hammocks are bonuses.
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I know this is old although I can't find its original home? |
I'd also like to throw in something Baroque or ornate in there just to confuse the "Organic Modern" purists. It's like 10% Scarface in your room. Or what I'm imagining Scarface to be... honestly, I've never seen it and am kinda okay with it. But I know enough to know there was white and lots of money so it makes sense in my head.
Statement art is personal preference. Sometimes too much of a focal point is hard for me, like, you gotta LOVE that piece of art so much you want to look at it all day every day for the rest of your barren existence. Kinda like a tv?
However, I'm kinda feeling this all white piece here:
It's both pleasing to the eye AND scream pretentiousness! So perfect. A giant piece of framed white takes balls and will confuse your guests and family. "But... what is it?" they'll ask and you can just roll your eyes and say something pleasantly condescending about a study of albinos in snow and also existentialism as it relates to color theory and no one can really say anything after that.
Confession: I have a magnetic board I got from the Ballard outlet that's just a distressed black interior in a gold frame. I use it as art I give no fucks.
But next on the list is white art for sure.
I also love how all of these interiors have furniture that literally looks like it was made during a VBS. Albeit a VERY swank and talented VBS but you have to be able to see the grommets and twine. Nailheads sticking out and shit. Leather still warm from the animal. We're going for authenticity.\
But mostly white. Authentic white. Is there even such a thing as authentic white? Considering how much time I'm spending lately trying to find the specific combination of borax, dishwashing detergent and Oxi-clean to get the pit stains out of my clothes I'm thinking no.
Perhaps I'll have to settle for sweat-stained greige. When people ask my color season - Summer? Winter? - I'm just going to respond with "What eye makeup palette goes best with sweat-stained greige?" and see what Mary Kay thing I end up buying.
When in doubt I could distract from the ugly with something shiny. It's the reason I wear so much jewelry.
Or maybe if I start wearing pretty wood paneling it'll have the same effect. Like a sandwich board dress. I couldn't sit down but when I commit to a style I MOTHERFUCKING COMMIT.
I also need to commit to curves. And also a completely random assortment of furniture just floating around the room...??
This seems much more doable and less floaty.
Who needs decorative pillows when you have plants? They're just as great for cuddling and they're also alive! It's like one step away from actually having friends.
Hahaha just kidding my plants (that I keep alive) are my friends already. Pretty soon they're gonna feel like they're living inside of a white padded cell when I'm through making the decor changes around the Ranch. But it's just because I love them so much and want to protect them.
From me?
This stream-of-consciousness is getting weird. I must be thinking about holding plants hostage because I did so much yardwork/plant murder today that my fingers hurt and maybe I feel guilty even though my yard looks pretty. But mostly it's weird cuz of the drunkness.
Okay so be prepared for twelveteen more posts about white rooms this summer until I've had my fill and move on to a style that I REALLY CARE ABOUT THIS TIME OMIGAWD THIS IS THE ONE I MEAN IT THIS TIME.
Here's some white space in honor of this post [
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*slow clap*
DeleteI told husbandperson that I'm going to paint our walls and ceilings bright white when our hardwood floors are done and he was all like "White? uhhhhh" so I'm going to have to show him this blog so he can see I'm not alone in my desire for white. (although, my couch is purple, my favorite chair is red and his favorite chair is blue, so you know, some white somewhere is a good idea...)
ReplyDeleteHaha sometimes white feels so refreshing against a lot of color. Godspeed, my friend!
DeleteYou continue to CRACK ME UP. And what is VBS? How did I miss that? I was going to comment more but then you talked about existentialism, and what could I say after that besides "deconstruction."
ReplyDeleteOhhhh VBS is vacation bible school which is so ubiquitous in the South that I forget the rest of the world might not know what it is!
DeleteI envy you...
Oh thank jeebus, because I thought it was something to do with Vaginal Birth...Something because a VBAC is Vag Birth After Caesarean. The mental pictures your post created were horrifying. Just placenta and white furniture every where. I'm going to drink that image away now.
Delete"Placenta and white furniture everywhere..." AHAHAHAHAHA! Also, I need to google VBAC b/c I don't understand this concept. Bloody white furniture I'm find with but VBAC I don't get...
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