Where food porn comes to life but not in a gross way.

So I did this thing last weekend that you are totally gonna want to do because it's a good thing.  An easy thing.  A fun thing.  A thing that's slightly embarrassing but also really cool and it's like a bridging your internet life with your real life and that's always good right?  Unless we're talking about your sexcam business and I think we all agree that should never be brought into real life. Ew.

After talking with some friends, we came up with the idea of doing a Pinterest dinner party!  We really need to work on the branding here because it sounds fucking lame as shit but it wasn't.  

Everyone has their personal recipe boards that are always full of delightful food porn but 90% you'll never make because pinning is almost LIKE cooking it except not at all.  Well, if you throw a potluck then people magically get excited to try those things.  

It's like how I decide to host a dinner party to magically force myself to clean my house.  It's the only way I'll ever have all rooms of my house reasonably clean at one time.  They usually revolve in various stages of clean to dirty but each on their own schedule.

But I was able to make the living room presentable, threw a tablecloth on the coffee table and some Cosco flowers in some vases and we got this party on and poppin. 

In my floor.

Welcome to the ModSauce Ranch living room.

I'm a great host.  Hope you didn't have back problems, friends, because we're bohemian chic now whether you like it or not.

Anyway, the menu included some stuffed peppers and banana pudding that were delicious but not from Pinterest therefore I'm pretending they don't exist. because it's fucking with my theme.  Other items included salt and vinegar kale mashed potatoes and spicy Thai noodles and they were delightful.  We gave a big middle finger to a cohesive menu.

I made bacon jam from here because BACON JAM and how could you not want to spread pork on things?  

from my Instagram

I threw it on some Havarti and crackers and it was pretty damn good.  It needed something to detract that it was a meat paste and someone suggested a thin slice of apple or pear and I think my brain exploded with the idea.  I also put it on a burger later and it was ridonk.

I also made a black bean and quinoa salad from Oh She Glows that was good but not blowing me away.

pic from Oh She Glows

It needed more dressing so I just kept throwing on anything wet I could find the rest of the week.  My Costco sells quinoa by the barrel so I'm making quinoa every damn week now.  I'm the youngest person in Costco by far but my lust for quinoa is of meme proportions and I'm fine with that.  

I'll be the posterchild for middle class white people with my Costco card and barrel of quinoa while people make fun of me on Reddit and I won't care because I got my perfect protein at bargain prices and it's fucking delicious.

I also made some Thai turkey meatballs in a green curry from here that was pretty bangin.

pic from Minnesota Monthly

Would actually be good over noodles like a Thai spaghetti and meatballs but we just ate them naked.  Look, I can't do everything around here.  It took a long ass time to spread that thrift store tablecloth on my coffee table.

All in all I thought it was a really fun time and it made me/us actually turn Pinterfantasy to reality and with delicious results.  

The best part is that that I'm still eating bacon jam at least twice a day and have a shit ton more Thai meatballs in the freezer waiting for a nice evening when I need them.  

Thanks, Pinterest!  I've given you three years and you've given me bacon paste and meatballs!  I think it's a fair exchange.