Monday, May 24, 2010

I squee for former Soviet architecture!! Who knew?

I have a soft spot for 60's awesomeness so when I ran across a group of mindfuckingly awesome vintage architectural photos on Grain Edit (via Robert Burghardt's FZZ Fanzine) I thought "hey these sure are zippy!" And then I read that they are WWII memorials in the former Soviet Union I was like "aww shit."  Guess I can't sail my way through THIS blog post like all my other musings on unicorn dreams and rainbow gummi bears.  I don't know how we're going to balance my normal hilariously irreverent style while being respectful of the Holocaust but let's see what happens.

These memorials, only a handful of thousands, were erected to honor the former Yugoslav Partisans - a group of communists who fought against the their fascist leaders aligned with the Axis powers during WWII.  They were the only resistance movement to free their country without the help of outside forces.  They sound pretty badass.  This is the first I've heard of them because I went to a public school in the South and our history classes ended at the Reconstruction.  We pretty much still live like we're in the Reconstruction.  I've got my eye on you damn Carpetbaggers!!

The Makljen Memorial.  It's a giant rock cloud that I would live in if it wasn't, you know, a Holocaust memorial haunted by ghosts.  

Or destroyed.  It makes Madame Sunday's heart hurt.

Here. More info here.
The Jasenovac concentration camp was the largest death camp in Croatia killing at least 500,000 people.  This memorial dedicated to the people who died there was unveiled in 1966

As Robert Burghardt nicely articulates:
In their abstract vocabulary they allow for an appropriation of meaning that bypasses official narrations, especially today, after their context has become invisible. They open the scene for numerous associations; they could be ambassadors from far-away stars, or from a different, unrealised present. The openness which originates in the abstract language of the monuments is a visual manifestation of the emancipation from the Stalinist dominance of socialist realism in the eastern bloc, in which future is represented only in a happy-overreaching form of the present. The monuments invoke a utopian moment, stick to aniconism, and translate the promise of the future into a universal gesture.

The 'broken wing' memorial at the Sumarice Memorial Park to honor the victims of the massacre at Kragujevac, Serbia. 

here. More pics here.
The people are particularly poignant in this one.  

These three clenched fists are at the Bubanj Memorial Park dedicated in 1963 to the 10,000 people shot in Nis and Southern Serbia during the war.  All of the monuments featured are considered to be in the style of Socialist Realism (not to be confused with Social Realism which turns out I squee over too.  Thank you Wikipedia.), a modern art movement developed in the former Soviet states to promote communism and modernism through art.  Hence big concrete fists.

last two from here
The park today showing graffiti on the momuments and more vandalism on a wall of relief sculptures.  The previous relief sections include a giant machine gun and and line of people awaiting execution.  This relief shows the victims.

The Makendonium monument in Krusevo.  Or, as someone pointed out at Grain Edit, perhaps a giant bumble ball...??!!

At night showing the stained glass window.

The memorial at Petrova Gora began work in the 70's but was finally completed in 1981.

Now it is also abandoned.  The contrast of futurist desolation, the lonely movement of the building and the green overgrowth really rocks my world.  As Burghardt explains, these sites "..still proclaim a future, which already has become past." Probably the reason that, although sad, the images of them falling into ruin is quite appealing to me as it visually captures the intent but ultimate failure of these memorials.  So preservation people let's get on this.  But not before I go there and take a lot of pictures with my new Omega J899900000 Camera of Amazing Awesomeness.    

Battle of Kozara Memorial.

The Grave of the Undefeated at Prilep finished in 1962.

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!  I WANT TO GO TO THERE!!!!!!  This is a monument commemorating the Battle of Sutjeska by artist Krsto Hegedusic done in the 1970's.  This spot just made it onto my top five list of places to visit of all time.  I'm pretty sure if you walk in between those crystal mountains your life changes forever.  They're like big concrete oracles or something and will tell you your future.  Or give you special powers.  

Here it is today.  It looks a little like something you'd stumble across one day while hiking here in the Tennessee valley.  If I was the type of person who actually hiked.  Which I'm not.  So there might be something like this a mile from my house and I'd probably never know.  Note to self: find some hippie friends and buy hiking boots. 

More pointy fabulosity.  Although all of these memorials are heavy "monumental" sculptures I find them hardly static at all.  More like stone outcroppings that move slowly over millennia but appear frozen to us.

These last two are both part of the Sutjesko complex all of which are now abandoned.

The memorial monument at Mount Kosmaj in 1961.  Of course now it is also abandoned.

Gawd this is awesome.  The tension that happens at the center of those three bursts(?) drives me insane.  I'm no functional adult architect or engineer but I think it takes a pretty talented person to create a 'moment' (*eyeroll* myself) in negative space like that.  I don't know - maybe it's like #367 of A Pattern Language but I totally didn't read that far.

I think something really special happens there like exploding rainbows or something but I'm not sure.  I'm going to guess it's the place of first contact for when aliens visit earth just like Stephen Hawking said.  Or maybe there's a singularity or black hole of some kind that allows for time travel.  I'm gonna go with time travel because I've read the Outlander series and those structures are totally humming to me right now.  (high five if you know what that is)

The only way I would want to be in the center of that thing any more is if Jamie Frasier was standing in the center of it holding Edward Cullen in one hand and a Krispy Kreme Double Down sandwich in the other.  I would run so hard my arms and legs would fall the fuck off.  Then my Boxing Helena'd stumpy torso would inch up those steps like a worm, my path lubricated from the saliva pouring from my drooling open mouth.

The ensuing orgy of debauchery would probably be the best (and most accurate) ambassador for the visiting aliens.  

Welcome to Earth.

*all images from FZZ Fanzine unless otherwise specified.  More photos at rb.fzz's flickr.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Way to go Pantone. You killed Florida.

Turquoise, I know what you're trying to do and it's not working.    

Even though the pairing of blue and orange is my favorite complimentary color combo EVAR, all of this fabulosity that I'm seeing these past few months is not make me turn a blind eye to your evil plan Pantone.

Using it with delicious juicy tangerine might sway the general public but I'm not falling victim to your plot to spur Turquoise consumption!!  Because guess what more blue means?  The need for more OIL!!  (Seriously.  If you haven't you need to read this old post first.) 


Because guess what happened Pantone???!!  That sandy beach behind that adorable vintage camp table is not pristine anymore.  The ocean floor has been vomiting up Pantone's favorite ingredient so that beach is now covered in giant tar balls and dead dolphins you FUCKERS!!

last two via From the Right Bank
Oh that was a close one.  Fortunately I quickly recovered from the fabulosity of that tufted chair and that awesome graphic quilt.  I steeled myself.


Ironic huh?  Cute little butterflies that are no doubt soon to be all tarred up in filth.  You disgust me.

You know I like creepy animal things but this isn't going to work either.  I'm too drunk smart.  I'm still thinking about oily crabs and dead turtles.

Won't be wearing these to the beach this year.  

Ok look.  How bout we make a deal?  If you cut back on the oil, give us the Gulf back I'll totally concede Panama City Beach to you.   You can have it completely.  No questions asked.  I mean no one really likes it anyway.  It can be yours alone to dump your oily filth for all your Turquoise orgies and then we'll just pretend that all this never happened.

The only time I've been to PCB was the time I traveled there on a "Bikinis 4 Jesus" church retreat with my friend's youth group in the summer of 94.  It was one of those “progressive” churches where the youth director said ‘damn’ a lot and played the guitar.  I remember it was the Spring because on the van trip home a girl cried because the radio announced that Kurt Cobain died.  She also cried the night before because she was so moved by the beachfire rendition of Amazing Grace played by Steve the youth 45-yr-old youth director and his out-of-tune guitar.  As I was raised by heathens you can see how all this was very confusing and why I worshipped grunge music.  Also why I hate PCB.

I guess if we're being honest Madame Sunday did have another trip to PCB later but it involved blackouts and a dolphin tattoo. 

Ahahahahahahahahaha!  Just kidding.  It was a peace frog.

So Pantone let’s compromise –  if you keep Turquoise to yourself you can have PCB if we can have, say, the REST OF THE FUCKING GULF?  Mkay?

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Words broken.

This'll have to do for a hot minute until I can restock my wine cabinet formulate real sentences.  I know what you're thinking that usually my sentences are just a list of cuss words and references to Mexican food but YOU'RE WRONG!!!!  ModernSauce is a finally tuned machine of... of...  dammit.  My words are broken.  My brain is like a thick globby bowl of queso right now and I just can't make any fucking sense out of the English language!!  Prepositions and clauses are such assholes.  

Also: banana tentacles = bananacles.  heh. 

Monday, May 17, 2010

This makes me exceedingly happy. The alien robot edition.

From the 1956 movie The Forbidden Planet.  This is Robby the Robot and Altaira - some fancy chick.  I don't know what the fuck is going on here but I need to see this movie immediately.

Apparently robots from outer space are little bitches who will comb your hair.  OR they are evil geniuses because they know when someone brushes my hair I fall into an instant catatonic state so I'm guessing these are gay robots who have come to earth to hypnotize all the females so they can go after the men.  Dudes, watch out.

Robby has a serious case of lymphedema in the legs and loathes Altaira for taunting him with her sexy gams.

Your guess. 

No Robby, you dumbass.  You walk to stage left AFTER I scream and faint.

Looks like these people are gettin jiggy with it.  I have aliens on the brain because I watched MIB II this weekend for the sole purpose of seeing Biz Markie beatbox and to marvel at how Tommy Lee Jones fails to age but is a still a serious hot piece.  Maybe it's just me.

Robby: Beep boop beep
Altaira: Oh the phone's for me?

The mini-blind robot car.  Horrible gas mileage.

The best model sets ever.  I would frame this picture.

all images from here

Friday, May 14, 2010


I found out that today is Bloggers Without Makeup Day.  As painful as it is for me I decided to post a picture of myself sans my normal layers of stage makeup and glitter.  It's a little embarrassing but hey, Madame Sunday is all about being forthright.

I feel positively EXPOSED!  So naked without my bumpit. 

I did cheat though.  I put on some clear lip gloss but I don't think you can really tell in this picture.  My lips start gettin the shakes if I don't keep them glossy 24/7 so It's really for my health at this point.

FYI - I had my fake eyelashes surgically implanted a few years ago so NO I can't take those off.  They are a part of me now.  As it always should have been.