Sunday, March 7, 2010

Saved by Meatwad. Yet again.

Madame Sunday just wanted to confirm that my brain is in no way rotted away with all the springtime sweetness that this beautifully warm and possibly soul-cleansing weekend has brought us.  I'm still as cutting edge and lame fierce as ever.  Thank goodness right?!  I mean SOMEbody has to be the beacon of truth for all us normal bitches who don't regularly just swoon with orgasmic glee over the mere sight of a bouquet of flowers.

Martha Stewart from here
Or butterflies.  Martha do you want me to vomit all over this delightful bouquet for Christ's sake?!  Bitch please.

Like some stanky-ass rat is gonna change my mind about all this dreamy nonsense and whimsicle fuckery.

You be straight trippin if you think I'm gonna feature adorable button-shaped shortbread cookies in pastel shades with an artfully designed recipe that you can print from right here that would most likely be wonderful with some afternoon tea.

Alli Coate Illustration from here
Awww HELL to the Naw!  Even though I've collected skeleton keys since I was about 10 there's no way in hell I'd be putting this lovely and affordibly-priced print of them in fresh colors and sweet patterns on this here blog.  Uh Uhhh.  You betta recognize.

You must be outcha damn mind if you think this soft focus piece of pink heaven is gonna pass the strict ModSauce approval process.  

Wait.  I feel woozy.  I think something is happening...

Oh. OH!  How could I even eat this stupidly delicious cupcake once I've seen its little blushing cheeks and precious little bow.  Awwwwww.  Wait... 




Fuck Yeah!  This is the only kind of face on food that I can deal with.  All that bloody raw meat completely wiped my brain clean of all that saccharine prettiness.

Whew.  That was a close one.  

Yeah.  I still got it.

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